Layers

In the past month that I've been living in the beautiful countryside of Orzignano, I've made some interesting observations that I'd like to share. I know that I've still only scratched the surface, so these will grow and change with time, but right now this is what I see in my world!

First, Italians hardly ever say 'I love you' to the people in their life that they happen to love. I don't know if this is just within this particular family or if it's a general Italian thing, but to me it's the weirdest concept to digest because in my family, we say 'I love you' all the time: when we get off the phone with each other, when we do nice things for each other, when one of us leaves the house to go to school or work, right before we all go to bed, etc...you get the point. I've never thought of it as excessive before, but maybe it is? I've caught myself almost saying 'I love you' to Giulia when I say goodnight out of habit with my own family. But at the end of the day whether it's excessive or not, I can't imagine not saying it to the people I love as often as I do...

Second, with almost all of the Italians I've met and spoken with, I've noticed that when they speak English, they say 'fantastic' a lot (in their adorable accent mind you). It seems to be their favorite word to describe the things and places they adore. It's really cute, especially because most of the English-speakers I know rarely use it! To put it in perspective, they use 'fantastic' almost as much as we say 'awesome'. Yes, that much. They also use 'in fact' a lot in places we would never use it (we would use 'actually' instead), and this I can understand since in Italian they say 'infatti' all the time. I love living with this family for many reasons, but one of the main ones is that I'm learning how Italians really speak, and I'm learning that [thankfully] they don't speak like a textbook ;) It has been perfect for furthering my knowledge of this beautiful language.

Third, they love American music. I realized this last year in Florence too, but I thought maybe they constantly played it to make tourists feel more at home, but no...they actually...like...it. I hear it at the beach where I'm sure no tourists go and in many other VERY Italian places. Wherever I go it seems like, I hear the lyrics of On the Floor and Higher and Waka Waka (Cecilia's personal favorite). I guess I can't be too surprised about it since I really like Italian music, something that might make Italians raise their eyebrows. Maybe it has something to do with the foreign language that is so appealing, because it's out of the ordinary and new and exciting, but who knows. Music is one of the best ways to learn language (slang, too) in a fun, interactive kind of way...but I think I would like it even if I had no idea what they were saying.

Speaking of beaches, their system is totally different...and in my opinion, totally crazy. The price, anyway. Giulia told me that to rent a space on the beach complete with your own little cabina (basically a small storage space for beach toys, picnic supplies, etc.) is around 1,800 EURO for the year. THAT'S INSANE! At least they can split it between family members, but still. That's a ghastly amount to pay for some fun in the sun. Another very different thing compared to our beaches is that the sand is covered with chairs and umbrellas that are there permanently (which have also been assigned to the renters), and are different colors depending on the "bagno" (pronounced bahn-yo) they're a part of. There are a million of these bagni along the coast, each with a different name, and some of them are actually pretty creative; paradiso, venere (venus), perla (pearl), etc. From a bird's eye view I'm sure it looks like a rainbow coast!

Another thing I've noticed is that weekends in particular are reserved for spending quality time with family and friends. And when I say quality time I mean either dinner or the beach, nothing else usually. Everyone is at the beach Saturday and Sunday, which means that if you leave the house at 10:30am and then wait to leave the beach at 5:30pm, there will be an extremely long line of cars to and from that can delay you an hour or more on a car ride that is supposed to take 25 minutes. So far I've been pretty lucky to avoid the worst of these dreaded lines, and I hope it stays that way! Anyway, back to the point, which was that every single weekend they have dinner with their outside family either at their house or at ours. For some of you this may seem completely natural and are wondering why I think it's so different, but in my world weekends are quiet, relaxing days around the house spent normally just with immediate family. Of course we see other family members and invite them over sometimes and vice versa, but not nearly as often as they do here. And I think I've gone to the beach more here in one month than I have in the past three years at home. I actually have tan skin again!

Italians yell and raise their voices a LOT. They do this more than enough at each other, but especially at their kids. I don't think I've ever heard so much yelling in everyday life about such simple things, and I actually (in fact haha) don't remember my mother ever yelling at us kids that much. Dad yelled a lot more in general, but the only time I can really remember my mom yelling was when we would do something that really scared her (like walking into the street without looking both ways). Anyway, I think their continuous yelling has a lot to do with strong Italian pride. They can be very touchy and get set off by the slightest wrong action, whether it's an honest mistake or a tad rebellious, which then constitutes the string of angry, scolding words. In my mind it's a bit excessive, but it is what it is. It's one thing I'd rather avoid if I ever have my own kids.

This experience is light-years different than the one I had in Florence. I didn't know it while I was living there, but now I can see that I got a very surface level view of Italy and Italian culture, and now it almost doesn't feel real. It's almost impossible to really get a feel for a place until you live with natives, either literally with them or just near them, and have experienced thoroughly more than just one city. It's also really hard to get a deep understanding of a culture when there is a torrential pour of tourists flooding the city. I don't want to diminish the experience I had last year because it was beautiful in it's own way, but I'm having a much more authentic experience this time. I wanted a deeper understanding of Italy and that's exactly what I'm getting, and I'm even more in love with it than before.

I'm sure I'll continue to discover funny, strange, interesting, crazy, beautiful things, people and concepts, and it excites me that I have the opportunity to peel back the layers of what it really means to be Italian. For some reason I love these prideful, emotional, passionate creatures more and more each day...this is definitely where I belong.